Getting angry

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"Were you getting angry at the end?" That's what Coach Adam asked me while we were reviewing last weeks workouts. And honestly, no I wasn't. My cadence was falling, the power numbers were dropping but I wasn't angry. Like with every workout, it was measured and metered. Finish the interval, make sure there's enough for the next one. Focus and recover. Stay settled and in control. Mind in the present but ready for the future.

Maybe that's my problem. I've always held back - always making sure that there's enough for the next day. It's served me well in the past, allowing me to run two marathons back to back in under 3:10. It's been a good self preservation strategy throughout my time in sports. But how much has it limited me? How much further can I go if I let go of reason and step up to the edge? Two options - I fall and have to catch myself or I find the wings to fly.

Standing on edge - time to get angry. Time to let to of the mental walls I've built to protect myself. Control works both ways - the power to ensure enough for the next day and the fortitude to push thru the barriers. I've learned one. I need to master the other.

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