Reflection

It's taken me a bit to sit down and think about 2017. One things for sure, it was a memorable year, filled with ups and downs. It was a year of remaking identity and rebuilding. There were the highs of riding across the Continental divide with Amber during the Breck Epic and the lows of finding myself in the snow within seconds of a race start. There was the thrill of descending Canyon Creek in the dark and the disappointment of having to pull out of three trail races. How can such a spread of emotions be compared?
 
Sunsets aren't the end - they are the start of a new chapter
One of the best memories I have of the year is week of the Breck Epic. It's truly something that should be shared with another rider and I was lucky to have Amber as my partner. Racing Breck Epic was her ides, reaching the finish line at the end of six hard days her primary goal. And so we climbed mountain passes, picked our way through rocky descents, and worked together to reach that goal. I also learned a lot about myself as a rider during that week, about the drive to get up every morning and start another long day in the saddle. It was a great reminder that the best teammates aren't necessarily the fastest riders - but the ones who work together and support each other throughout the event. I can't say anymore about the race that I haven't already said during the reports - but if you get a chance to take on the Breck Epic, I highly recommend it. If you can find a great teammate, even better.
The best teammate for the BE!

But before I even got to the starting line for the Breck Epic, there was the exact opposite of emotions. The feeling of disaster before it happens, the gut-wrenching sensation that there is nothing you can do to stop the inevitable. I always say it could be worse, but at that moment, trying to dig my bike out of the snow and not get run over by the entire field of racers behind me, I wasn't so sure. I was dazed and I couldn't use my left shoulder. I can honestly say that was one of the worst crashes I've ever had - and the fact that I went on to finish the race most likely made the damage to my left shoulder even worse. But early Febuary is a fine time for some recovery and I was soon pedaling and running hard again, making plans for mid-march adventures. Long runs, long rides and getting ready for the real race season. All that came to a screeching halt as I was left wondering how much I would really be able to do. Three running races DNSed. The real fear of not being able to race the Growler, but spending a month inside on the trainer making sure I would have the fitness if I was able to race.  If given a choice between vision and racing, the answer is clear. Luckily, I have a great team who understands that riding and running are part of my lifestyle and drugs that let me do both. (Do I need a TEU for ophthalmic atropine? Do I even care?)
New trails - they don't always mean great trails, but that doesn't matter.

Yes, 2017 offered some challenges, but it also allowed me the chance to reflect on how I tackled those challenges. I also learned to moderate the intensity and the drive for success. The gung-ho, head on strategy might work for some things, but it's not my nature. I do like diving into things head first, but after doing a least a little reasearch before. Diving in before testing the depth of the water is a good way to get hurt... There's more to life then simply racing and sometimes the well crafted training schedule leads you away from the goals instead of closer to them. It took a forced separation from sport for me to realize what it means to me. It's not just about the times and the spots on the podium. Those are nice, but they are just benefits. It's about being able to ride things I wasn't able to tackle before. It's about being able to do things with the people who are my best friends. I can give up the racing if needed, but I can't give up the experieances. That's what 2017 taught me and I'll remember those lessons.

The best days are the ones with no agenda and some new discoveries - that's what I learned

Sometimes you have to make your own friends!

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