Just keep smiling.

In less then 12 hours I will be taking the first step in this crazy journey. The Stories Ultra 30 hour race starts at 06:00, in the pre-dawn chill only a February morning can provide. I have the pit set up - hunting tent, heater, the full gamut to do this right. I know the course - Cheyenne Mountain State Park is practically my backyard trails. I know where to expect mud, where the packed snow will be and where there is ice. I have a piece of my heart watching over me on Purple. If I am not ready, it’s too late to worry. What is done is done and what will happen is to be written over the the course of 30 hours. I have one major goal and one dream goal. I have to hit 100k, but damn - that Teddy Bear Buckle is just adorable!

Regardless, I need to remember one thing. Keep smiling. It’s so easy to get trapped in the darkest areas of the mind - especially when the 2:00AM demons are lurking, the temperature is sucking the life out of you and the last thing you want to do is one more lap. I’ve been there before - on wheels. Every time the alarm went off, no matter how tired I was or how miserable weather was, I’ve headed out. That’s what you do what racing as a team and your partner is counting on you. You show up, ready. Even as a solo, it’s the same. From the time the gun goes off until the race is over - keep moving. Only then it’s the crew you are letting down if you stop. So you stare down the demons, put a smile on your face and head out again. I’ve never faced the demons on foot before. Will the voices be the same as on wheels or will they sing a slightly different tune to compel you to stop?

Hammering out the nerves while marking the course. It's actually a lot of fun!

Keep smiling. The outward expression of positivity - regardless of the inner battle. Sometimes the outward expression can out-weight the mental struggle. Appear positive, happy and that’s the reaction you inspire from other people. No matter the hour, we are all out there facing our own struggles. Maybe a smile from me will spur someone else a little further. And maybe the positivity will help me conquer the demons. The voice whispering - nay screaming at this hour - that I haven’t done enough, my training too lackluster for such lofty goals. Acknowledge the doubts but keep them at bay. Keep smiling. Stay positive. That’s been my mission over the past year in both training and racing. Keep it fun and stay positive. The demons have haunted me for years, from close to home and far away. Now is the time for me to finally stand up to them. Smile right at them and keep moving. But in order to do that I have to keep smiling.

Keep the eyes open for the simple beauty over the course of the day. 
What story will be written this weekend? I'll find out soon!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A long way on foot - Sheep Mountain Endurance Run

Mortality

Regaining my mojo

Friends with the Monsters..