Conflicted on Goals

March - normally by now I've gotten my entire event schedule planned out, with goals for the season. This year has been a little different. I still haven't quite gotten the plan down other then Growler and a few small running races. Part of the problem is there is so much to choose from - a race or fun sounding event nearly every weekend.... And what do I want to focus on? After a year of mostly cycling, should I maintain that momentum so I'm even stronger for 2019? Or maybe a mental break off the long rides and return to some running fun? So many questions.

I find myself torn between sports this year. The riding focus last year was great and really what I needed after the effort of the 50m race. But I find myself seeming stuck in a rut as this year starts - same races, same rides, same trails. While I love the Growler and the atmosphere around that race, I don't find myself looking forward to it right now. And after that, still so undecided. Five would be nice, but maybe something else would be more fun. Unfortunately there's so few races with the chances for night riding anymore and that's one thing I love doing. I know I want to return to my first 100 mile MTB race, but find the motivation for that event lacking. So maybe next year. Maybe. There's a whole host of options if I wanted to skip the night riding, but I'm not sure I'm ready for that.

While I wrestle with the idea of maybe not really racing my bike much this year, I'm drawn back to some of the running races I missed last year because of my eye. Is it a need for redemption or just something to prove, that I'm still a fast trail runner? That I don't know. Or maybe just that fear of missing out - of not being present last year and now needing to make up for that. I feel like I've lost a little of my spunk running after last year's bike focus and find that the time on feet has been making me very happy so far. I love my bike, but there's something about the simplicity of running. It's been two years since the 50m - long enough for me to forget how much it hurt and start pondering another one!  Maybe. I don't know.

Again, there's so much out there to do it can become overwhelming. I know I need to buckle down, find the events that call to me and then the motivation will come. It might be a return to the familiar, to a cozy start on a bridge in the middle of the night. It might prove to be something completely different.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A long way on foot - Sheep Mountain Endurance Run

Mortality

Regaining my mojo

Friends with the Monsters..